ROEL TIMMERMANS

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Empathy is not just 1 thing

Empathy isn't just a pink, vague, hippy type of concept. It can really be force to bring change into organisations and teams. For sure it is not one that come easy to everyone. I’m one of those, I struggle with parts of it (more on those further on).

In a nutshell, but that doesn’t do it justice. It's about the ability to see the world through someone else's eyes. To understand their thoughts, feelings, and experiences on a deep, emotional level. And when wielded with intention and authenticity, empathy has the power to build bridges, foster connection, and ignite positive change.

 

Some stats around empathy:

There are many upsides to empathetic leadership in the workplace, including:

  • Inspiring positive change within the workplace (87%)

  • Mutual respect between employees and leaders (87%)

  • Increased productivity among employees (85%)

  • Reduced employee turnover (78%)

But also there are some things going wrong:

  • 52% of employees currently believe their company’s efforts to be empathetic toward employees are dishonest

  • 47% of employees increasingly report a lack of follow-through when it comes to company promises

Source: https://www.ey.com/en_us/news/2023/03/new-ey-us-consulting-study

 

Real-Life Stories of Empathy in Action

Let's take a trip down memory lane and explore some examples of empathy in action:

The Tale of Two Colleagues: 
Sarah, a seasoned employee, notices that her new colleague, Mark, seems overwhelmed and stressed. Instead of turning a blind eye, Sarah takes the time to sit down with Mark, listen to his concerns, and offer her support and guidance. The result? A stronger bond between colleagues and a more supportive, compassionate workplace culture. In some cases Sarah can just stop after listening. Not everyone wants a solution, they just want to be heard.

The Client Connection:
When a client reaches out with a complaint, instead of getting defensive or dismissive, the customer service team at Company X goes above and beyond to understand the client's perspective, validate their feelings, and find a solution that exceeds their expectations. The result? A loyal, satisfied customer who sings the company's praises far and wide.

 

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Empathy is being concerned about the human being, not just their output.

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 - Simon Sinek -

 

The “levels” to empathy:

Like I said before, empathy is not just 1 thing. Like a lot of soft skills, you can look at it as a spectrum. Each of us can be on a different piece of it, and to a certain extreme. And unlike popular belief may have you thinking, we can influence how “good” we are at it to a certain extent.

These are the different kinds of empathy:

  • Cognitive Empathy: Knowing what others think and feel (thinking in their shoes).

  • Emotional Empathy: Feeling what others feel (catching their emotions).

  • Compassionate Empathy: Wanting to help others who are suffering (acting on empathy).

  • Somatic Empathy: Feeling physical sensations in response to others' emotions (body mirroring emotions).

As you can see it also has quite a different impact and way of showing itself. Now, coming back to my initial statement. Emotional and Somatic are the ones that are least represented in my emotional toolbox.

 

Bringing more Empathy into the Workplace

So, how do we work on a culture of empathy in our own workplaces? Here are a few tips to get you started:

  1. Lead by Example:
    As leaders, it's up to us to set the tone for the entire organization.
    Model empathy in your words, actions, and decisions. Your team will follow.

  2. Listen with Intent: 
    Practice active listening—really tuning in to what others are saying, without judgment or interruption.
    Seek to understand before seeking to be understood.

  3. Listen First:
    Your voice is the HiPPO (Highest Paid/Placed Person’s Opinion).
    That can overcast what others would’ve wanted to say. Forcing them to keep it locked up.

  4. Encourage Vulnerability:
    Create a safe space where team members feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, feelings, and experiences openly and honestly.
    Vulnerability breeds connection, and connection breeds empathy.

  5. Celebrate Diversity: 
    Embrace the rich mixing pot of perspectives, backgrounds, and experiences that make your team unique.
    Recognize the value of diversity and use it to boost the empathy and understanding.

Don’t be afraid to try them out, no one is perfect in this.